Every Foster & Adoptive Parent is at Risk for Secondary Trauma

Every foster & adoptive parent is at risk for secondary trauma (or compassion fatigue) and might not even be aware of it.

The symptoms of secondary traumatic stress look a lot like its big brother, PTSD—elevated heart rate, hyper vigilance, apathy, sleeplessness, irritability, confusion, exhaustion…to name a few. And they’re brought about simply by caring for traumatized people.

Trauma doesn’t keep itself wrapped up neatly in one person’s experience—it bleeds out & touches all those it surrounds. And just as trauma does to our children, secondary trauma impacts our brains and bodies and beliefs.

So what can we do to protect ourselves? We can do pursue things that elicit the opposite of that scary list of symptoms—peace, joy, rest, health, trust in the Lord. The antidote to secondary trauma is proactive, intentional self care. For me, this looks like:

+ waking early to have a quiet cup of coffee & read my Bible—starting my day off regulated & grounded in truth
+ dating my husband
+ going to community group—Bible study & prayer & laughter
+ spending time with friends & my extended fam
+ coffee & wine & seltzer
+ going to therapy
+ getting enough sleep
+ housecleaner
+ fresh air & sunlight
+ reading & music & podcasts
+ doing life-giving work that I'm passionate about

Your list might look different, but it’s important you have one. If you’re anything like me, taking care of yourself can be continuously pushed to the bottom of the list. But we must humbly submit to the needs of our bodies and souls and proactively take care of ourselves. We need us to and our kids need us to. 🫶🏼

What’s your favorite or most effective form of self care??👇🏼