Humans of Foster Care - Post #4
We had a pre-adoption bonding evaluation with one of our foster children this week. Parents often feel like they’re being judged by others, but this was literally a time for us to be watched and judged by an expert. At the evaluation the psychologist (who works solely with foster children) said, “I just don’t understand the approach these social workers try to sell: ‘Love this child completely, as if he is your own, but be prepared to give him up at any moment.’ No one is able to do that. You know who is able to do that? A sociopath.” The psychologist was warm and intelligent and insightful, but she didn’t see the full answer to her own question. You know who is able to “do that”? Someone who has been rescued and transformed by the gospel. The gospel that motivates foster care. The gospel that empowers foster care.
My ability to wholly love yet willingly surrender a child in my care doesn’t come from the fact that I’m a sociopath (I am not). The strength to do it doesn’t come from the fact that I’m a “saint” or “supermom” (two names that strangers - and only strangers - throw at me). The power to love and let go and fight every other battle that comes throughout the odyssey of foster care is the sacrifice that Jesus made for me.
“He who did not spare His own Son but gave him up for us all…” This is WHY I can give up a child I love. This is HOW I can give up a child I love.
#HumansofFosterCare - Photo cred: Hannah Marie Photography