There Is A Better Version of Foster Parenting.

I came into foster care sure of my place: You lost your kid, so that makes me — automatically and obviously — better than. Yeah, I’ll take care of your child, but I have no space for you — you abuser, neglector, addict, criminal, fill-in-the-blank.

I came to understand that I can’t be for vulnerable children, while turning my back on their vulnerable parents.

I can’t celebrate the gift of my family, and hope that another’s be torn apart.

I can’t claim to love a child yet hold onto hate for their parents.

I can’t be philosophically pro-reunification but personally anti-parent.

I can’t be a recipient of amazing grace, while forgetting that “but for the grace of God..”

I was selling my kids and their families and myself short, buying into a cheap version of foster parenting that vilifies and demonizes, that chooses judgement over love.

But there is a better version of foster parenting. One that is fueled by humility and a heart for redemption and restoration and healing.

Foster parenting in its best, fullest, most beautiful form, is for the whole family.